Leaving On A Jet Plane

I haven't written and there is so much to write about. Where do I start? Who do I start with? On my connector flight home from Houston last night I watched the sun set from high in the sky. I just finished watching The Vow and I seriously had to turn my head away from my sister and Lisa so they couldn't see me getting choked up. I had a moment. The movie was romantic and the ending song was "Pictures of You" by The Cure. It's one of my all time favorite songs. I'm pretty sure I've even posted it here before. I have so many memories attached to that song. The movie was about a couple coming back together, like their hearts never forgot one another. As I listened to the song and looked outside the window and fought back tears I thought of Carlos. I don't know why he has been on my mind so much. I don't even know how I feel about me thinking of him. It's not a yearning to be with him. I can best describe it as a visiting a chapter in one of my favorite books. That one chapter that once you are reminded of its contents, you have an a-ha moment and realize just how much joy that book gave you when you first read it. It's the part of the book that you are first to think of or describe to someone that asks you about it. It's that special feeling in your heart that no matter how many other great books you read, they will never replace that chapter. I called him right now, I know he wasn't going to pick up. I'm not even sure what I would have even said had he picked up. I think I just miss the Robin that was so in love. He obviously had a lot to do with that, but I loved that sincere, genuine feeling. I hadn't felt that before or sense Carlos.

I've run into him two times now and I've heard three stories of people's encounters with him. My mind isn't lost but my heart most definitely is. I still have a big heart, but I feel so guarded now. My wall is getting higher and my temper even shorter. I keep putting myself "out there" and I just have no patience. I get aggravated easily and I snap. I know what the right thing to do is, but I keep fighting it for some odd reason. My head feels like its spinning, I'm trying to get used to this new job that came out of nowhere, finish up these last two weeks of school and have a social life. One day I will look back on this and be grateful for these moments. When I'm actually experiencing them it's not that fun. I feel confused yet grounded.

Things I Look Forward To

• drinking a tall glass of horchata
• buying a new headband
• the next song Pandora
• vacations
• dates with my boo crew
• being inspired
• falling in love ♥ 
• finding awesome quotes
• taking pictures
• finding that perfect vintage mirror

I guess that's all...for now :)

If Only I Were As Organized As This Fella....

Some of my friends have joked about me dedicating a blog strictly on my dating experiences (especially those online dudes.) I just ran into this story and I must admit, I'm a little jelly. I want a spread sheet!
http://deadspin.com/5902760/finance-guy-keeps-incredibly-detailed-incredibly-creepy-spreadsheet-of-his-matchcom-prospects

Where Is My Mind?

How is it that I have this much free time, yet not be up to date via blog? Even in my every day life I feel out of it! There's so much to blog about!!! Ok ok...this week is spring break, so my unemployed ass will catch up. :)

Let's Fly A Kite...

This song makes me want to be in love.

Everyone's Got To Eat

I can't help myself. Maybe I should take the advice of many of my friends and start a blog or calendar of all my Internet escapades. I have tons of stories. It's kind of disturbing. Well, we have Elisha Peter Joelle Espinoza. ::sigh::

Now, POF has brought me many a bad fish, but not this time. Our first date was randomly made on April Fools Day. I picked him up and we headed out to the Verdugo bar in Highland Park. Immediately we chatted it up like we've known one another for years. It just flowed. We clicked. He is so handsome and so intriguing! I can see the wall. I felt the wall. He's very engaging. We ended up going back to his place and listening to his AMAZING music collection. Hands down, NEVER EVER have I met a man that has all the music I have and love. Stuff I hadn't even heard of!!! We ended up smoking and having the greatest make out shesh...and... yeah.

I spent the night and stayed until I had to go to school. Today is his birthday, the big 36. There's something about his eyes. It was just such a good night. We made lists of our flaws and best of. It was great. I took him to lunch today at Don Cuco's. He's really not feeling his bday, but I'm such a fan of them!! So, I took him to Dots and bought him some cupcakes :) We went back to his place and snacked and cuddled. How do I slow down!!??

I don't want to.
And I don't care.
Feet first. ♥

Promise Honest

I haven't forgotten about you blog. I have a lot to post about...bdays, boys, moving, school, unemployment. Let's play catch up this week, yes? :)