Often I sit at my desk at work and think about running. Like, between the hours of 7am and 330pm I just get this urge to get up and be active. Of course, I feel this way because I have to stay sedentary at my dual monitored desk. Once I'm out of work, I come home and plop on the couch. I have stuffs on my mind and decided to be productive tonight though and I got dressed and went to the Arcadia high school track. I recently found my Ipod and I finally learned how to sync the music from my computer to my Ipod. I downloaded all my Sia and decided its time to try that puppy out!
Yeah, so I go to the track and start my walk. I tell myself I'm going to walk at least one complete album. I almost made it. While walking, I remembered that the last time I was attempting to be healthy I would go to that track (with Mr. Hale of course) and then I started to think of where I've come since then. Of course I start thinking about what's going on in my life now and I started to quicken my pace. Then it hit me, Sia's lyrics: ♫ Throw away yesterday, today is a brand new day ♫ and I swear to you, it seemed as though the lights on the field got brighter and I felt at ease. I love how her music just does that for me.
Something has got to give. I'm totally changing subjects and I don't care. So, today Rosemary read my tarot cards. This is the second time that she has done so. Pretty spot on. Without reading too much into it, it summed up what's going on with my life now. Exes (well, Danny) that won't go away...a loss of a job....a move...new opportunities and prospects. I try not to take things like that too seriously but I'm such a sucker!
Yesterday I met him. I never have met a guy that's been on the same page as me. He came off strong as did I. I loved it. When we first met, I didn't think things would get that intense. The night prior we stayed up until 3 am talking and texting. We decided why wait and just meet Monday. So we did. It was magical. I felt alive. I felt appreciated and adored. I didn't want to leave. I was so turned on! I felt respected and anxious. Feelings I haven't felt in quite some time. It's hard to think logically and to just put the brakes on when you're actually in the situation. We texted throughout today but it doesn't seem the same. I know, I need to relax. It kinda bummed me out because I started to really think maybe I haven't made as much progress emotionally as I thought. Maybe I have. Who knows. Either way, I have to not take everything so personally. I need to just take it "one day at a time." Whatevers supposed to happen will.
Patience? What patience?
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