Ironic

Flagpole
To see a flagpole in your dream represents a sense of stability in your life. You may find that those around you are ready to support in your whatever you do or decide.

Yeah, so my dream last night was alllll about Carlos...and flagpoles. Weird. So, as I've stated before we broke up last year on August 5. I totally would've thought this year on that day I would be all reminiscent of him. Turns out I was lovesick over a man, but it was Chris and not Carlos. That really threw me through a loop and kinda made me even more bummed out with the thought that I had no one but two heartbreaks under my belt within one year. I got over it. Today is Chris's 29th birthday. The past few weeks I've been going back and forth about sending him a card, inviting him out or simply just texting him. I decided to IM him on Thursday wishing him a Happy Birthday. My work there was done. The winds blew out my power Wednesday night this week so I've been at my sisters. In a way, I wanted Sunday to come and go because I didn't know how I was going to feel. Last night I accompanied Jax to the Covina Christmas Parade. It was great, and cold! Everything seemed to remind me of Carlos. Old cars, men with hats or mustaches. I went home to my sister's and fell asleep. I had the most intense dream about Carlos. His ex was in it as well and I wanted answers. I told them both off, I did everything except hit her. He told me he just never got over her and he basically has always been deeply in love with her. For some reason I saw a flagpole in the dream. I woke up dazed, hurt and curious. So curious that I texted Carlos and asked that he really consider getting together to talk. I told him it was time for some answers. Of course, he hasn't answered back. He probably won't. Funny how life happens sometimes. Today I was nervous I'd be sad about Chris, and it turns out I was thinking about Carlos.

This is a thankful and blessed time of the year. Most of all, this is only right now.